Monday, October 28, 2013

of pecah kereta and appendicitis

bismillah....

quite an eventful period shall i say. kereta kena pecah on 25th Sept and had been admitted and operated for acute appendicitis on 1st of Oct.. new lesson learned and new experience gained. Alhamdulillah...

ikutilah catatan seorang pesakit. aha :P

jam 10.15 pagi 1 Oktober 2013

aku memandu kereta dari rumah sewa yang terletak di Hutan Kampung (10 min from hospital) ke Hospital Sultanah Bahiyah. (the place where i do my 5th year clinical postings).

jam 10.30 pagi 1 Oktober 2013

sesampainya aku di jabatan kecemasan HSB. perasanku berbolak balik sama ada mahu berjumpa doktor atau tidak. ya, aku sedang sakit di bahagian bawah sebelah kanan abdomen. tetapi yang aku gusar, bila jumpa doktor kecemasan, lambat laun mereka pasti akan refer kepada bahagian pembedahan. which is the current posting i'm in. to make it even more interesting, aku ketua posting surgery, yang mana aku sentiasa berhubung dan bertemu dgn kebanyakan surgeons and some of the MOs. aduh. malu dan memeningkan kepala dibuatnya.

nak berpatah balik pun ada. kerana ia bukanlah sakit y sampai berguling2 dibuatnya. the pain is still tolerable.. tapi aku gusar kalau benar apendiks puncanya, aku wajib berjumpa doktor. kerana kalau apendiks y bengkak aku biarkan, ia boleh pecah dan bernanah dalam kawasan abdomenku. itu lagi dahsyat keadaannya berbanding hanya apendiks y bengkak.

aku memberanikan diri mendaftar sebagai pesakit. without mentioning i'm a medical student of course... ok dapat green zone tapi yang fast tract punya. .

vital signs taken, and doctor in-charge already standby to examine me. and as expected, he think there is possibility it is an acute appendicitis.

Doktor A: "ok adik. kena duduk sini (kecemasan) dulu. kita risau kalau betul apendiks adik bengkak kita kena operate.. adik tingkatan berapa sekarang? sekolah mana? umur berapa?"

pesakit: "erm, saya 23 tahun doktor." -_-'

Doktor A: "oh, nampak macam budak sekolah. sorry2. sekarang belajar kat mana?"

pesakit: "erm. kat sini. tengah praktikal kt sini."

dipendekkan cerita. aku ditolak ke kawasan yellow zone. to set branula, take blood samples and set up IV drip.oh they ask me to sit on a wheelchair. -_-"  ok malu. sebab my friends y tengah emergency posting ada kt situ. -_-"""

11.00 pagi 1 Oktober 2013

settle.. ditolak ke observation room. (ruangan untuk pesakit stabil/waiting to be review by respective department referred).

IV drip on. (untuk rehydration. mengikut standard, pesakit yang sedang kesakitan, kena hydrate. dan juga kena puasa as a preparation in case of incoming operation.. so IV drip as a source of energy in simple word)

i haven't eat since morning. so bila suruh puasa, erm. bertabah. tak ada selera pon anyway.

1.00 tengah hari. 1 Oktober 2013

MO and HO on-call surgery department datang menjengah. first sentence dari MO. "hey. you, what are you doing here? what happen?"

errr.. aku dah agak. mesti MO y kenal punya. -_-"

finish examine, they are still unsure whether its appendicitis or not. i didn't have the classical signs and symptoms of appendicitis. 1)severe pain start from umbilicus and radiate to right iliac fossa. 2)nausea, vomiting 3)positive rebound tenderness and positive Rovsing's sign 4)elevated white blood cells (as sign of infection).

the only positive sign is severe tenderness on deep palpation. but that is enough to ring the bell i guess. so they retreat. making call for someone more experience i guess.

3.00 petang 1 Oktober 2013

from behind the curtain, i could sense the presence. not sure who but must be somebody yang hebat ni. terus duduk straight and senyap kot. and yeah. its a she... a final year surgery registrar (MO who is currently taking master program to become specialist). boleh rasa kot aura hebat dia. tak berani nak banyak cakap.

straightly she ask to lay down and expose.. directly press onto affected area.. whooooaaaahh.. screaming tak ingat dunia. seriously painful!!! she's the only person who manage to locate EXACTLY the painful area...

powerful words from her to the MO, "can't you feel the appendix?" (whoaaaa.. i didn't know we can feel the appendix??? O_O hebat2)

"okay, schedule emergency appendicectomy for her"

uhuks. sah. kena operate.

MO: "okay. memang kena operate lah ye. dah tahu kan procedure dia. kena admit... bila last makan? puasa ye start from now. nanti sign consent form and tunggu OT panggil"

pesakit: "erm. okayyy. doktor, lap kan? (lap = laparoscopy = tebuk few lubang kecik, masukkan kamera and potong apendiks through that, so = smaller scar, less painful, less post-op complications and reduce hospital stay)"

MO: "taklah, open."

pesakit: "ha? kenapa tak lap?"

MO: "sebab takde kepakaran.. nanti MO y akan operate." (laparoscopy usually handle by specialist. so takkanlah specialist nak handle kes kecik macam appendix kann?)

pesakit: "ok faham" (bigger scar, more painful, higher chance of complications ,etc) -_-'

5.00 petang 1 Oktober 2013

admitted. surgical ward 3C. general surgery. sabar je la dengar penerangan 1st year student nurse buat ward orientation. (takpela dik. i'm a student too. totally understand the feelings. layan je la)

6.00 petang 1 Oktober 2013

pain increasing in severity. tadi ekshen. doktor kat kecemasan nak bagi IV Tramal (painkiller), refuse. "takpelah doktor, sakit dia boleh tolerate lagi" hurmmm.

sekarang dah tak boleh baring dah. kena duduk n lean forward. baru tahuuu.
"erm. nurse, nak painkiller boleh?"

clerking by HO in-charge of the ward.

HO: "macam pernah tengok la awak ni. belajar kat mana?"

pesakit: "erm. saya medical student.. tengah posting kat sini doktor. posting surgeri. dah minggu ke-7"

HO: "oh. medical student? padan la macam pernah tengok"

senyum je mampu. lepas ni more and more people will say that. i'm sure.
IV Tramal given. jadi pening dibuatnya. its the side effect. but the pain surely becoming more tolerable.

7.00 malam 1 Oktober 2013

makin ramai kawan2 satu batch datang menziarah. untungkan jadi medical student? boleh datang melawat bila2 masa. aha. so thankful to them. family already informed. now, patiently waiting.

everytime waktu solat, cepat2 solat in case the OT might call. asar tadi, dah. maghrib, dah. isya' dah.

10.00 malam 1 Oktober 2013

my housemates datang ziarah sekali lagi. membawa barang2 keperluan as well. THANK YOU guys. truly bless to have u guys as my housemates. my second family.. ^_^

12.00 tengah malam 2 Oktober 2013

OT masih tak panggil. seharian berpuasa.. 3rd IV drip if not mistaken. doa2 esok je lah operate.

12.30 tengah malam 2 Oktober 2013

dalam fikiran, 'esok kot baru operate ni. tadi rasa dah banyak sangat emergency case kena paggil... tidur dulu la'

baru beberapa saat memejamkan mata. "ok adik, tukar baju ye, OT dah panggil"

uhuks. its tonight. T-T

1.00 pagi 2 Oktober 2013

terbaringlah daku diatas strecher sambil ditolak nurses menuju OT. the feeling was... terrible.

memerhati siling ward berganti dgn siling lift, siling hallway, menuju koridor OT, disapa angin sepoi2 bahasa dari tingkat 3 bangunan OT y terdedah, ditemani bayu malam berlangitkan bintang.  Allahu. berdebar. that's the most memorable feeling so far. rasa macam dah menuju bilik mayat pon ada. istighfar the only way untuk tenangkan diri at that moment. feeling soooo kerdil di pandanganNya. everything happen for a reason. and insyaAllah aku redha atas ketentuanNya. terdetik dibenakku, andai aku ditakdirkan kembali padaNya maka terimalah aku dalam keadaan beriman dan Islam. T-T

1.20 pagi 2 Oktober 2013

inside the spacious OT of HSB.  di atas strecher. masih memandang ke siling. memerhati lampu2 di siling hallway OT. sebijik macam dalam TV... bila pesakit ditolak masuk through the hallway, sambil the camera facing the ceiling. totally the same.

review by MO surgery, at the observation area inside OT.

"oh medical student ke? nobody told me. i hope i give good impression. i'll try to make the incision as small as possible ok?"

dalam hati, 'buatlah apa2 pon doktor. aku hanya berharap selamat semuanya'

branula yang sedia ada di tanganku tersumbat maka terpaksa dicabut dan dipasang yang baru. 2 kali percubaan dilakukan.. 3 kali dicucuk termasuk semasa di kecemasan. now i know how patients felt when we keep on poking them if failed to insert the branula on the first attempt. (so please guys. we must do it well later on. ok?)

1.30 pagi 2 Oktober 2013

ditolak masuk ke OT 1. (OT for emergency case).

diberi oksigen, disuruh bernafas seperti biasa. dari ekor mataku, dapatku lihat Propofol (ubat bius) sedang disuntik masuk melalu branula ditangan kiriku..

5 seconds later, terasa di awangan, penglihatanku seperti dironyok bagaikan sekeping kertas. ZAPP. i lost consciousness.

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couldn't be sure of the time. i started to regain consciousness. because of the pain at the surgical area. its totally painful!!!!

on and off. sekejap conscious sekejap unconscious.

4.00 pagi 2 Oktober 2013

aku kembali di dalam ward. tidak aku sedar bila mereka menolak aku kembali.. aku masih di atas strecher. dipapah kembali ke atas katil. totally helpless. toilet duty is very much depend on the nurses. dipapah ke toilet dan kembali ke katil. sgt2 berterima kasih pada jururawat2 y melayani. i'm soo sorry i couldn't say thank you at that time. hanya Allah dapat membalas kebaikan kalian.

the episodes of vomiting start.

for the whole day. aku muntah tidak berhenti.. makanan hanya masuk untuk beberapa minit. akan keluar semuanya... dengan sakit di kawasan pembedahan, dengan muntah tidak berhenti, im totally helpless. hanya mampu terbaring. IV drip yang ke 5 mungkin..

i keep on going back and forth between sedar dan lena. few times aku rasa lebih sihat.. cuba untuk duduk di atas kerusi, tetapi kembali pening dan terusan muntah.

aku gagahkan juga untuk ke tandas mengambil wudhu' setiap kali waktu solat walau dalam keadaan pening terhuyung hayang.. bersolatlah daku di atas katil. Allahu.. benar2 ku rasa keindahannya memuji keagunganMu walau dalam keadaan sakit.. T-T

sewaktu ward round pagi, dikatakan padaku aku mungkin boleh discharge andai aku sudah boleh tolerate orally. tetapi sehingga ke petang, aku masih berterusan muntah. maka aku masih belum boleh keluar..

lalu dipindahkan ke wad 6C atas sebab2 tertentu. dalam perjalanan ke wad 6C. aku muntah lagi ditepi lift.. (kes lupa nak bawak yellow beg). kesian kat makcik yang kena bersihkan my vomitus although i don't know who u are. thank you so much. T_T.

Alhamdulillah. pada malamnya, aku tidak lagi muntah. tapi tak lalu untuk menjamah apa2 makanan... selesai solat isya', aku terus tertidur. quite few times aku terjaga akibat sakit di kawasan pembedahan. sedih juga terasa kerana sentiasa keseorangan sepanjang dalam ward. tapi positively aku berharap esok boleh keluar insyaAllah.

3Oktober 2013.

paginya, Alhamdulillah berasa lebih sihat. finished a total of 7 IV drip..

selesai ward round pagi with the surgeons yang aku kagumi, Mr.N and Mr.E.... akhirnyaaaa dibenarkan discharge. ^_^

and here i am. almost a month after the operation. just SOOO many things that i have learn through this experience. nothing can replace it.

Alhamdulillah for EVERYTHING that happen.

unique things about my beds. bed 12 in emergency. bed 11 in wad 3C. bed 10 in 6C. 12,11,10. ^_^

*catatan di hari ketiga operation...

"Dia memilih aku menjadi antara y bertuah utk merasai sndiri dicucuk branula beberapa kali after each one blocked, merasa sndiri duduk dlm wad memandang setiap staff dan doktor y doing round, merasa sendiri perasaan diberi propofol b4 op,unconscious smpai finish op, merasai sndiri perasaan drowsiness with persistence vomiting for the whole day after op.

Allahu Allah. I wouldn't ask for more. The experiences, i wouldn't exchange it with anything else.

Dpt acute appendicitis je. Dah operate, dah discharged. Cuma jd kura2 jap for few days xboleh jln laju2. Haha.

*Lessons learned. Try to put yourself in the patient's shoes. You'll appreciate and cherish them as much as possible. You are not treating the illness, you are treating the person. Alhamdulillah for the experience. 

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ALLAH know!

"dan Dialah y menidurkan kamu pada mlm hari dan Dia mengetahui apa y kamu kerjakan pada siang hari. kemudian Dia membangunkan kamu pada siang hari utk disempurnakan umurmu y telah ditetapkan. kemudian kepadaNya tempat kamu kembali, lalu Dia memberitahukan kepadamu apa y tlh kamu kerjakan." Al-An'am 6: 60

motivating one-self!~

"la yukallifullahu nafsan illa wus'aha"
Allah tidak membebani seseorang melainkan sesuai dengan kesanggupannya" al-Baqarah 2: 286

~~kadang kala Allah sembunyikan matahari, Dia datangkan petir dan kilat.. kita tertanya-tanya, kemana hilangnya mentari?? rupa-rupanya Allah gantikannya dengan sang pelangi yang indah... ^_^